Dwindling down

So times dwindling down with Devin and I. It sucks but I think ive already come to terms its happening. I woke up feeling different today. Very stand offish. Everyday I wake up and my moods different. One day Ill be so in love my heart hurts missing him. Another day like today. I get so mad he fucked everything up. One day Ill want to marry Devin. The next I want to end it. I guess thats what I get for being a girl. So indecisive. I dont know if I want to marry Devin before he leaves. Yesterday I did. Today I feel we should wait. I know waiting is the Right decision. But I think with my heart and not my head sometimes and it gets me into trouble. I know I wont fuck up or meet anyone while hes gone. But who knows? Im so flip floppy today. Who knows where my head and heart will be tomorrow.